California’s latest racket lottery game is “Go Bananas,” a scratch-off contest that claims odds of about one winner per every five tickets (at a buck each.) That includes tickets that win you other tickets. The chance of getting real cash are twelve to one. In the interest of public service, I’ve purchased five tickets, labelled them, and will scratch one out every day for the coming week. If you’re really bored, check back in tomorrow to see what I won (half of everything I win will go to Bioversity International, the banana conservation organization.)

THE WAY THE TICKET WORKS: You scratch off six boxes. If three match you win. There’s a bonus “quick $10 spot” box that – if the number ten is revealed – nets you that amount of money.

MONDAY I LOST. Got a pair of $6.00 scratches, and one $500. Tease. TUESDAY I LOST. Got a pair of $150s. WEDNESDAY, THURSDAY, FRIDAY, LOST LOST LOST! Lesson: you can’t save bananas with lottery tickets.

Here’s a stupid page from the California lottery that lists the entire array of theft devices they offer.

The point of all this, besides making me richer than the book ever could, is to point out – once again – that the origin of the term “go bananas” is not necessarily known. See here.